I was going through files from my college laptop and I found this video from 2010. It was in my choir class at Pepperdine with Milton Pullen, and us music education majors were taking turns practicing conducting our own choir. (The piece is “Amor de mi Alma,” by Z. Randall Stroope).
It’s really moving to me to watch this, because I remember it and it was such an important moment, because this was, quite literally, my very first time conducting a choir. Like. Like standing in front of a choir and conducting in a rehearsal. I had stood in front of a class of maybe 10-15 peers a few times before this, but never an actual choir.
This moment on video was the experience that made me realize I wanted to be a choir teacher. (Before that, I had thought I might teach band or orchestra).
It was really difficult for me, because I had to get out of my head- it’s one thing to imagine music, but then to try to communicate it with other people? By looking at them and moving? So difficult! 😂
I was so overwhelmed by the sound. It’s so much louder when you’re standing up in front. I laugh when I watch the video now because, toward the end, people weren’t singing too loud, I just didn’t know how to deal with the sound because I’d never felt it before.
I was also so moved by this sense that though the choir was formed of individuals, that together, they formed a living, breathing organism, like a beehive in front of me. It was exhilarating and terrifying.
And then… trying to share something together all at the same time? Where they were creating and I was responding and there was this ongoing back and forth? So overwhelming and incredible. I couldn’t get enough of that feeling.
Anyway I realized that I wanted this to be here. It’s an important moment in my life.
sdfhai
